The Misapprehension of Bella Swan by hunterhunting

The Misapprehension of Bella Swan Regarding the Inferior Intellect of Hockey Whores
is the full title

ACTUAL REVIEW OF THIS WIP FIC IS STILL TO COME

By the middle of chapter 2 this story started pwning the hell out of me. Something about (a) this sailor-mouthed Bella and her drunken badass ways, and (b) hunterhunting's frickin lemons. You just know there are gonna be lemons, and they will be hot frickety hotness. Yes, there will be hotness.

Official Description: The Misapprehension of Bella Swan Regarding the Inferior Intellect of Hockey Players: Through incessant stalking and persistence, can Edward wear down Bella's resistence and teach her to embrace her inner puck bunny? A ridiculous love story. AH/OCC   WIP 

BELOW ARE MY CHAPTER REVIEWS. AKA SPOILERVILLE, USA. If you haven't read the story yet, you might want to avoid.





My Review of Chap 2
Smart Hockeyward who is always finding excuses to slip his fingers under the elastic of Bella's pants... he's a keeper. I'm hooked in, I'm in it, I'm invested. I'm also crossing my fingers her Spiderman jammies end up in a ball on the floor of his hotel suite. And praying that the next chapter doesn't c0ckblock, Emmett-style.

I have faith in hunterhunting, that at some point she will dispel any of the misapprehensions I might have about hockey players perhaps needing to compensate for certain things by swinging a big ol stick. I'm pretty sure I need to be convinced otherwise via vivid description of what Hockeyward is up to with Bella sans clothes. js


My Review of Chap 3
//Feel free to be pissed at Bella for giving it up, for Edward for fucking a girl who's been drinking (as has he) or me for letting them get it on.//

Are you freaking kidding me here??!? You are generous and merciful for not c0ckblocking. In my last review I begged for vivid description of hot, fun, sexytimes with Hockeyward. Way to deliver, sister. Way. To. Deliver.

You could teach a master class on writing straight up, f_ckhot lemons. The pacing, the visuals, god, and your description of their sounds. Gah! I might have moaned a couple times along with them.

You have left me with warm butterflies in my tummy, and the image of a gargantuan peen, sheathed in what must have been an XL jimmy hat.

I cartwheel for your lemons. Love, Althea
p.s. I kept thinking about that Daily Show episode that Rob was on, where Samantha Bee did that segment on the dude with the gigantor shlong. He didn't want to do porn because it would threaten his integrity as an actor. And SammyB is adamently trying to convince him that he'd be great in porn, that he was born to do porn. "Mozart was born to play piano. You, have a 13 and half inch penis. Your last name is Falcon." Maybe he could play hockey.


My Review of Chap 4
That was a tasty chapter. Round 2 was smokin. Can't wait to hear from Edward.


My Review of Chap 5
//I would never live down that interview I did for Playboy.// Will we get to see said interview? Pretty please, with whipped cream on top

I wonder why Edward is so preoccupied with maintaining whatever foul rep he has cultivated? Yeah, he would get sh|t from his teammates if he failed to live up to their image of him as a manwhore, but so what? Jasper seems to be doing just fine without having to cultivate a disgusting 'hit it and quit it' persona. I hope we get to learn more about the motivation behind this choice, and the choice to hide his intelligence.

Bc, as Bella knows, brains are f_ckhot. I vote for: Closet-brainy Hockeyward outs himself to Bella in a full-on display of intellectual prowess that matches his prowess in bed and on the ice. But that's just me. :)

Oh, and...
//I had sex with Emmett's sister. Twice. It could be the name of a book.// I'd buy that book


My Review of Chap 6
Bella is a pretty cool chick. But I'm curious what was really going on with her 'the day after' and what was her real reaction to those photos and what the puking was all about. Guess I'll have to tune in to the next episode to find out :)


My Review of Chap 8

I am not a hockey fan per se, but there is something compelling about an Edward that has the unique added dimension of being a focused and talented professional athlete. That life, that mindset, that Edward is so foreign to me. Then there's something about reconciling his 3 personas: the head-in-the-game often volatile player, with Edward's rep as a manwhore playa, and the Edward who seems to pursue Bella with an open heart.

I like when you have moments of interplay across these personas because you never know what part of Edward we're going to see, and which will influence Bella's understanding of him.

And a sidenote: the perv in me can't wait to witness their return to their roots via bedroom resolution of some of the poppin ST. jus sayin

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